Thursday, January 26, 2012

To My Husband on His 39th Birthday

Today my kids and I are celebrating the birth of a man who I'm not even sure truly grasps just how wonderful he is. He is the love of my life and my husband, Mr. Jason Jones. When we began dating almost eleven years ago, I knew I was in trouble. He was everything I was looking for and COMPLETELY unprepared for. Sure, I'd had a girlish crush on him since I was fifteen, but this was something totally different. I was twenty-three, fresh off an excruciating breakup, and ready to sow a few wild oats in the big city of Atlanta before I gave a second thought to things like marriage and family.

For almost a year, I put him through the ringer, first refusing to date him exclusively and then backing away every time I felt we were getting too serious. I even sulked when he took a job at a law firm in Roswell, and we ultimately ended up living in Atlanta at the same time in apartment complexes that were next door to each other.

When waiting for him to show up for a double date with my best friend and her boyfriend, I warned them not to get too attached to him.

"We're not going to end up being some fabulous foursome," I believe were my exact words.

Those were words I would ultimately have to eat when we got married two years later with both my best friend and her boyfriend turned husband in our wedding party. That day as I stood looking into Jason's big brown eyes, I wondered what I had been so afraid of and counted my blessings he waited for me to come around.

He is the joy of my life, and he has given me four of the most amazing blessings alive. I'm not saying every day is easy--far from it. In fact, every day we have to wake up ready to greet the challenges and stress of four kids, two working parents, a dog, a cat, and a house that is normally screaming for a good vacuuming. We have to work at our marriage and take time to remember who we are as a couple without our kids around. You see, we're two different people, and we don't always see eye to eye on things like the most efficient way to get out the door in the morning, who washes the most clothes, and whose turn it is to put Scout back in the bed.

What I do know is that at the end of the day, he is the one I want to cuddle with to regroup for tomorrow. He's the one I want to run with on a pretty day. He's the one I want to crack up laughing with when we New Girl is on. He's the one I want to talk to about the sweet little Jones kid stories that pop up throughout the day. He's even the one I want to pick a fight with when I'm grumpy because I know he's a worthy adversary.

He's my partner, my friend, and the perfect quiet balance to my Too Much Information approach to life. I love that he's a wonderful father and that he holds me accountable. Even though he drives me nuts sometimes, I love that I am the lucky one who gets to know all the annoying and endearing nuances about him. What a privilege to know someone on the level that we know each other and how lucky I feel that he lets me into his world the way he does.

For his birthday, I'd like to promise him that I will do a better job helping him make up the bed at night, especially since he loathes the feather bed I insist I need for my back. I promise to try and use my big kid words during a disagreement and respect his requests for space when he needs it. I promise to feed the dog more often and to ask for his keys to lock the front door before he climbs under the covers and gets comfortable. I promise to keep believing in his innate goodness and to support him in his endeavors. Most of all, I promise to love him unconditionally for the rest of my life and to wake up each morning ready to take on every day God brings our way. Happy birthday, Jason!

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